she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I forgot how hot balto sounded
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
