Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize
