I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
