420 ftw
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
