You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
