How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
