just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Randomize