Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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