Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
