I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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