just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
