Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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