ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize