Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
