Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
