dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
