it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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