he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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