covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
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