I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I would ride that face into the sunset
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
