i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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