Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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