You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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