so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
