Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
