Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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