Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
