sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
