he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
you win again, gameday.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize