So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize