Me. At least after what I've been through.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
