Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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