In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
You're like the curious george of whores
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Randomize
