Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
