Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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