hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize