I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
