No, you can still breathe under the balls.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
