wat bout pragnant strippers??
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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