My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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