Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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