I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
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