Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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