Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize