I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
they're like a gay fantastic four
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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