If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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