Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
