DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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