no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
