I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize