So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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