i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
