I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm at about main and main street
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
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